Saturday, August 2, 2014

Parking Payout

Machines for multi-space parking downtown Amherst

If you hate the downtown multi-space parking meter machines, you are probably out of luck hoping the town adopts more user friendly devices, unless of course a tornado takes all 12 of them out.  

The three year old machines had a plethora of glitches when first installed, but some of the problems have been addressed.  And like most heavy duty commercial machines, they have a 15 year projected lifespan, so they are currently only 20% of the way dead.

New shelters with large print directions and extra lighting seemed to have helped, but the machines' programming is still not as user friendly as an apple iPad.  And these days pretty much any machine programming is measured against that ubiquitous fruit.

Credit card processing is indeed a major convenience of the machines but it comes at great cost, since all the transactions are small in nature.  Amherst Treasurer/Collector Claire McGinnis confirms that "the processing fees cost us 26%-28% of the revenue per card each month."

On top of that the company we purchased the machines from, Duncan Solutions, charges $630/machine annually or $7,560 total, another loss of 7.5% of total revenues.  

Thus in FY14 (just ended June 30th) the multi-space machines in town center generated a total of $100,630 in credit card payments (up from FY13's $86,069) but when you factor in the total processing fees, we kept only about $65,000 of that. 

Ouch!

Coins, on the other hand, still seem to be in general use as the multi-space machines generated $168,120 in FY14, or 60% of the machines total revenues.

But, the town kept all of it.  

60 comments:

Anonymous said...

I will be sure to use my credit card when parking in downtown Amherst.

Adam Sweet said...

Maybe the town could use some of that money to hire a police officer and some fire fighters?

Larry Kelley said...

Yeah, especially since we now have all the "climate control" specialists we need.

Anonymous said...

still not bad for the town to bring in 230+K in metered parking fees. That's quite a chunk of change. Do you know how those revenues compare with years past? or to other towns (Northampton, for example... )

Larry Kelley said...

That is only for the dozen downtown multi use machines. When you add in all the traditional coin machines all over town, another $189,150, the total intake for FY14 was $457,900.

And then when you add in the parking fines and tickets you can double that total number.

Larry Kelley said...

Last year (FY13) total intake was $423,298 with $86,069 in credit cards (but we lost 35% of that) used in multi-space machines, $141,747 in coins used in multi-space machines and another $195,482 used in coins on all the other traditional machines.

Anonymous said...

wow!

Anonymous said...

I do not think we should be focusing directly on revenue…

Parking meters were initially designed as a way to ration space, encourage turnover, and offer access. They were not developed as revenue generators. However, good parking policy (meter pricing and equipment) can lead to huge improvements in the downtown, increasing tax revenue and local vitality.

Per transaction fees do come across as very visible costs, but what about costs associated with collecting large quantities of quarters? While it is no golf course but I could picture some similarities.

As the town develops (and parking prices increase) the quarters issue might start to limit revenue. They will need to do collections more often and if a meter is full people cannot pay. Increases in prices at the parking machines will probably have the opposite effect, processing fees will decline as a percentage of total revenue (the initial transaction fee is the main cost).

The parking machines are a step in the right direction. However, to end on a more townie note, the parking meters in Amherst suck. Honestly, I have NEVER had a good experience with them, as in every single experience with them has been @#$%ing terrible. The inputs rarely correspond to what they read back and machine is under responsive.

Honestly, the town should bite the bullet and replace the system with better variants of the technology. They could even raise parking prices to pay for the upgrade. The parking public would still be thankful.

Anonymous said...

So if I park at a meter, all the money stays in town?

I guess that's what I'll be doing.

Remind me again: what was wrong with good old-fashioned parking meters?

Anonymous said...

I hate those machines, put the single meters back up that they took out. No processing fees with those and its all cash!

Anonymous said...

But, Mr Cherry Hill, how much did we spend on parking (including hidden costs)?

Dr. Ed said...

I have a serious issue with the machines and it is an ADA issue.

I do not have the ability to accurately/rapidly punch in three numbers with assurance of accuracy. And I have no way of knowing if I was accurate because it does NOT give a receipt (or at least didn't used to.)

I have to enter the digits one at a time -- from a written scrap of paper -- and it is acquire digit, find button on keypad, enter digit, go back to paper, acquire second digit, find button on keypad at which point the damn thing has gone into administrative mode or some damn thing!!!!

I should perhaps add that not only do I have some "impressive" scars on my right hand from lobstering injuries, but I also have some underlying injuries that probably are exacerbating this by slowing me down a bit more.

Now I don't park downtown much -- I patronize Walmart -- and I'll swallow my pride and let some condescending do-gooder show me how to do something (that I can't do) by doing it for me. Fine. Thank you.

But if I get just one parking ticket, that's an ADA issue and a MCAD complaint. Trust me.

And no, I will NOT accept a town HP decal or having the tickets waived. It's called "least restrictive environment" -- I'm not looking for a fight and I'll pay the ticket -- and then the town will pay mine...

Anonymous said...

What are the costs to the town to hire the brown shirts that stroll around ruining everyone's day by issuing tickets. And honestly, these machines suck. Every time I use the lot across from the library, I end up talking visitors through how to use them. And 75% of the time my credit card is not processed. This is how to scare people away from doing business downtown. Another example of how Amherst is not a welcoming place to shop.

Anonymous said...

Can't wait till they put and automatic ticket printers at each space. Then we can get rid of the ticket writer by buying machines that only cost a few years pay. In fact the tickets could just go out like speeding cameras, people will miss the ticket in the mail and Amherst can then get late fees and interest. What an awesome way to fund a community.

So often I just skip town businesses because of the parking the machines. The sales tax on my purchases would have exceeded the meter, oh well, Amherst looses.

And to the guy mentioning and ADA issue. If you cannot deal with the keypads, I don't want you on the road driving. It is ok to be handicapped, it is not ok to risk our lives if you don't have good hand eye coordination. We all know the state will let anyone drive. Perhaps the meters are just the 2nd driving test?

Anonymous said...

im always baffled when people have trouble with these machines. they are so incredibly simple, it's unreal. you put your number in, then money. pretty easy, never had a problem, i think they work fine

Anonymous said...

Another day, another litigation opportunity for Ed.

Anonymous said...

Ed can write ridiculously long rants, but cant type a few numbers because he has a scarred right hand? Heres a thought, "Dr.", use your left hand!

Anonymous said...

Charming, urbane, fun-loving, humble, a listener, kind, considerate of others, easy to be around, calm, independent.....

These are all that Ed is, after he has blown off steam on this blog. He gets it all out here, and then he goes forth to be the change that we all want in the world.

Thanks, Larry. The Internet is where we can simply off-load all of this bad stuff, and be better public people as a result.

Anonymous said...

So here's "Dr." Ed and he can't remember a 3 digit parking space number? He has to write it down and keep referring back to his scrap of paper while inputting the number? Methinks UMass gave him the "Dr." to put in front of his name just to get rid of him!

Dr. Ed said...

And to the guy mentioning and ADA issue. If you cannot deal with the keypads, I don't want you on the road driving. It is ok to be handicapped, it is not ok to risk our lives if you don't have good hand eye coordination.

You ignorant ableist schmuck -- you aren't even bright enough to be a good bigot.

I can parallel part a 40 foot long bus with only 10 feet to spare -- can you? I'll bet you can't even parallel park your car.

I used to drive a fire truck and was good at it -- you'd probably freak out on your first emergency run and put the truck straight into a tree. Or worse, run over (and kill) a couple of your colleagues.

In an emergency (and I mean as in "something is on fire and/or someone is bleeding") about 5%-7% of the people can sorta/kinda function rationally. The vast majority of people will do absolutely nothing until someone tells them what to do, and then they'll do exactly what they are told because they are too scared to think. And then there are people like you -- liabilities.

And then there are people like me and I know what I can accomplish when life & property is in harm's way because I know what I have accomplished in the past. I'm quite serious about having personally prevented nine deaths at Planet UMess -- eight suicides and another fatality that would have been something else but essentially similar.

Has ability to save lives, but difficulty operating a parking meter -- I think that's a net gain, don't you?

Don't want me driving? Go have a chat with the no-longer-young man who was damn glad that I not only drive but was taking my laundry to the laundrimat one Saturday afternoon. He'd managed to get his car to roll off the jack and onto him -- and I nonchalantly got it back off of him -- the investigating officer subsequently asked me if I knew him -- "never seen him before in my life" I replied, adding "but it did seem like the 'Christian thing to do' at the time."

You, undoubtedly, would be one of the people standing there watching -- not DOING anything but watching.

I almost want to meet you -- just to see if an adult human being can actually be as obtuse as you appear to be. You remind me of the Saudi Clerc who believes that women will damage their vaginas if they operate motor vehicles...

And I'll bet you are ever-so-politically correct on everything else, aren't you?

Dr. Ed said...

Methinks UMass gave him the "Dr." to put in front of his name just to get rid of him!

We have an expression on the ocean: "Prove It, MotherF*cker!"

"Put up or shut up" -- there is an established procedure for challenging the legitimacy of a doctorate and I'd love to see some of you morons actually try it. It's a public procedure, you have to confront me with the basis of your allegation and I have the opportunity to show that it is unmitigated bullshit. You won't do well -- trust me -- and you won't be anonymous anymore, either.

UMass does not award it's most precious and prestigious degree to get rid of a student. No.

They either kick the student out or they buy the student out -- they don't simply hand the degree out -- that would destroy the entire shell game known as higher education.

I earned all five of my degrees -- I worked damn hard to earn them, and put up with a lot of crap in the process -- for a bunch of reasons, I had to work harder and endure more harassment than most folks -- I know that I've earned them.


So if you want to say otherwise, come out of the shadows, look me in the eye and tell me what the f*ck it is that you think constitutes evidence. Because, yes, you gotta have some...

Dr. Ed said...

Charming, urbane, fun-loving, humble, a listener, kind, considerate of others, easy to be around, calm, independent....

I'm not so sure about the "urbane" -- I'm a Maine Lobsterman, not to mention someone who never has less than TWO operable chain saws within easy reach -- I'm afraid that I'm not "polished" as much as I might like to be. And I don't think that anyone whom I let "across the moat" is ever unaware of what I think about something -- subtlety is not one of my many faults...

I appreciate the kind words --- but I kicked over this hornet's nest for a different reason -- I don't think I am the only person encountering this difficulty with those obtuse machines.

If you had to be able to lift 100 lbs to operate those machines, a lot of people (not just women) would be crying "foul" -- justifiably so. And I assure you that I wouldn't be saying "hey, I can lift 100 lbs, sucks to be you."

This issue really isn't that different. And much as we have made doors easier to open so that women can open them themselves instead of having to wait for a man to do so, I think the town needs to modify those machines.

It's a social justice issue...

Larry Kelley said...

Hey this is Amherst, no mocking allowed.

Or I'll throw a "Climate Control" school employee at you.

Anonymous said...

Just don't send a squadron of riot police at us.

Larry Kelley said...

They are all on vacation ... for now.

Anonymous said...

Dr. Ed thinks quite highly of himself. who woulda thunk

keithw said...

Dr Ed
If you are typing these comments from outside the confines of a hospital, jail or prison...then you have proven my point

Anonymous said...

Let's see, type in the three digit code. The machine displays the status of the spot. Add coins if necessary. The machine displays the new time for expiration with each coin. At any time you can come back and type in the three digit code and see the status of the spot. Real hard. Funny how a town of intellectuals can't figure this out. I guess entitlement does that to people.

Anonymous said...

"that would destroy the entire shell game known as higher education."

You make no sense Ed. When it suits you, you claim UMASS less than a reputable institution full of corruption, with the worst students going... The master of shell games in education. But because you got a nifty diploma suddenly you challenge anyone that would dare suggest such a thing. You are a very sad person. No one taught you that where you are in life is always because of you and no one else. You can't even remember a three digit number without writing it down. Amherst is a mighty sad town and you are its poster child.

Anonymous said...

The worst is when you park and then walk to the machine that's on line to your destination, and the machine gives a message that it's not functioning, use one of the others, so you walk BACK to the other side of the lot....... that's happened to me twice. If you're lucky it's not dark and raining or the lot isn't full of ice and slush.

The upside is sometimes you hit the jackpot and there's like an hour left on your spot that the sucker before you had to pay because s/he wasn't sure how long their appointment would take. Of course sometimes you're the sucker, either your appointment took longer and you get a ticket, or you payed too much.

Maybe some genius who frequents our crazy town knows the secret to avoiding these problems, I don't.


In Northampton I go straight to the garage because there's no chance of getting a ticket and you only pay for the time you use, no more, no less.

Anonymous said...

Machine didn't work, got a ticket. That's the first & last time I used a metered spot, parking garage included. I'd rather find a free space and walk. Or, I'll shop somewhere else.

Anonymous said...

I like the brown shirts! Full of information and kindness!

Anonymous said...

The machine is idiot proof so if it "didn't work" it was because of you, not the machine.

Anonymous said...

I can't wait for the day that Dr. Ed doesn't claim to have had every job or experience ever brought up or have saved a life in the process. Life experience has taught me that a person doesn't go through so many jobs and career paths unless they just plain old aren't good at them and are forced to keep moving on.
Also, in regard to all of the heroic acts, most people don't even have the chance to be a "hero" in a lifetime let alone the number of times Ed claims to do it. If they are not made up situations, perhaps someone should look into making sure that the good Dr. isn't one of the looneys that facilitates the situations to receive the glory.

Anonymous said...

I think there's a rep for Duncan commenting on this post.

Larry Kelley said...

Either that, or my resident Troll.

Dr. Ed Part 1 said...

I can't wait for the day that Dr. Ed doesn't claim to have had every job or experience ever brought up or have saved a life in the process.

There once were (and still are) a lot of communities that simply can not afford the type of police/fire/EMS services that Amherst residents enjoy. At the time, there were only three state troopers on duty at night north of Bangor -- each with a patrol area larger than the State of Rhode Island. There might be a game warden or a county/municipal officer but that was all there was. Fire & EMS was (and today largely still is) all volunteer -- well-intended citizens doing the best they could with little training and even less equipment.

These were the days of "scoop & run" -- scoop up the victim and run like hell for help. AFD can do more on-scene than the local hospital could back then -- and they have more "stuff" in their ambulances than many ERs did back then. Not only did 911 itself not exist (outside large cities) but these were areas so rural that the numbers that did were often toll calls and response times often measured in hours.

Back then (and today in many parts of Maine) if you wished to "help your fellow man", you had to go do it. The concept of "first responder" was literal -- while the goal was to "hand off" to someone else, if you didn't ACT, there wouldn't be anyone to hand off.

And the people who knew what they were doing were woefully undermanned (and sometimes pregnant -- someone who knew how to do what needed to be done but was currently physically unable to do it -- or in the case of HazMats, absolutely needed to be nowhere nearby because of concerns about what otherwise-acceptable levels of exposure would do to her child.

To this day, the response protocol in many places is one person to drive the fire truck or ambulance to the scene with the expectation/hope that there would be enough people on-scene to staff it.

If you were tall enough and strong enough to do what needed to be done, and trusted "not to do something stupid" -- to do exactly what you were told *AND* to say something if you couldn't and/or didn't understand -- if people had confidence that you'd "do now and ask why later", they didn't have the luxury of caring how young you were.

Likewise, there are a lot of potentially dangerous jobs (e.g. lineman) that don't require two people -- unless the one person gets into trouble which is usually the real reason why the second WMECO truck is there. But if that's not an option, people understand that possibly might be very valuable to have someone else who knows how to do "X", "Y" or "Z" should they ever be in a situation where they desperately need it done and can't do it themselves.

I would be very surprised if various members of the APD haven't been quietly told how to do certain things (e.g. shut stuff off) if they ever had to do it themselves. Likewise, while they aren't allowed to do it, I'd be surprised if most members of the AFD don't have at least a general idea of how to "pull a meter" to shut off electricity in an emergency.

Same thing here.

Dr. Ed said...

Life experience has taught me that a person doesn't go through so many jobs and career paths unless they just plain old aren't good at them and are forced to keep moving on.

Maine's largest export is college-educated young people. There were no jobs back then -- there still aren't many in Maine -- and hence what's available often takes preference over what's preferable.

Why this concept is so hard to understand is beyond me...

Also, in regard to all of the heroic acts, most people don't even have the chance to be a "hero" in a lifetime let alone the number of times Ed claims to do it.

Unless they are the type of person to whom others go for help, in an environment (unlike Amherst) where there isn't an AFD/APD to call.

I never cease to be amazed by the number of times I later learn that people would "have told Ed" if the situation worsened -- particularly since they can never tell me what one earth it is they think I would have done. (Not that I have any idea either...)

That's who I am -- "Ed will do something" -- and I always have. I never used to mention any of it -- I knew, God knew and I thought that was enough. But when the ACT Nazis (and others) started attacking my character -- to save $200 that they were legally obligated to pay me -- I realized that wasn't enough.

I instantly saw the need to show JUST how wrong those schmucks were about me. No, they were just lying and knew it -- it was everyone else who needed to know.

If they are not made up situations, perhaps someone should look into making sure that the good Dr. isn't one of the looneys that facilitates the situations to receive the glory.

Ok A-Hole, drive up to the Old Orchard Beach (ME) Police and ask them for a copy of the incident report that their officer wrote -- (he told me he was going to write one, I assume he did). It was the laundrymat off the Cascade Road.

It involved a circa '60's/'70's GM car and the bumper jacks that were used then -- the ones that had a little pin in the jack that mated with a hole in the bumper (one on all four corners) with the car then being lifted by the bumper (which you could do back when cars actually had frames).

A contributing factor was that GM had something like three different 5-hole bolt patterns on wheels, two of which were almost impossible to tell apart -- and the spare tire was one of the ones that were almost-the-same as the one the car needed -- and this may only have been on the rear (they had front disk/rear drum brake systems) -- I don't remember. But this was the right rear tire, which was flat.

Remember too that this was rear-wheel drive, which the emergency brake is also on -- if you didn't chock the front wheels, there really wasn't anything to prevent them from rolling.

The car somehow rolled forward, and his hand somehow became wedged between the jack and the bumper, with the pin through it.

1: How the hell do you "facilitate" something like this?!?!?

2: If I had, why wouldn't I have been arrested & charged -- his mother was standing there as were a whole lot of other people -- they wouldn't have said anything?

Not that facts are even relevant...

Anonymous said...

Oh Ed! You're my hero!

Anonymous said...

The buttons are of low quality and physically don't work well. There is usually a significant lag between pressing the button, and it showing up on the screen. I used one last Friday (behind Judie's) and couldn't enter the number "8" except by pressing a spot well above and to its right. Luckily when I finally got it to work, there was still 1:17 left! Plenty of time to pick up my pizza at A's.
And don't get me started on the curbing next to the entrance to the underground "garage" - a space needs to be eliminated there to provide adequate corner clearance for right turns coming from the Rao's end.

Anonymous said...

I usually try to drive downtown only when I don't have to pay for the meters, such as at night. Really appreciate the downtown banks letting people park in their lots after hours for free. I also park in the on-street neighborhood parking permit spaces. Don't need a permit for those at night or on the weekends.

Anonymous said...

Oh Ed! You're my hero!

A loudmouthed hero rarely is.

Dr. Ed said...

Oh Ed! You're my hero!
A loudmouthed hero rarely is.


But an individual with personal integrity will move both heaven and earth in defense of his (or her) personal reputation.

Something that individuals lacking integrity will never comprehend.

The buttons are of low quality and physically don't work well.

Which is exacerbated if your fingers are those of someone who as actually done some real work in your life.

There is usually a significant lag between pressing the button, and it showing up on the screen.

Bingo!

I thought there was more -- it's timing out while I am waiting for the number to show up.

Anonymous said...

But an individual with personal integrity will move both heaven and earth in defense of his (or her) personal reputation.

Uh huh. Will his retort to "By your own description, you sound like a bad driver" be "I nonchalantly save people's lives all the time, like a superhero"?

Is that what you call a non sequitur, or just loudmouthiness?

Anonymous said...

"personal integrity"? I'd love to hear how you define that term, Ed, having proven yourself a plagiarist, a liar, and a misogynist.* (And that's just on this blog -- who knows what colors you show in the real world...)

*Quotes available for the asking.

Dr. Ed said...

Screw the quotes. How about a name and an address to which I can send David Knightly?

I have integrity, you folks don't, and no number of cowardly snipers, hiding in the bushes, will change that.

Larry, you may wish to share with the town what appears to be a problem with their machines. They might want to fix them before they get ordered to replace them.

Dr. Ed said...

Larry, for the record, I have requested you to remove those "plagarized" quotes that *I* never posted.

Anonymous said...

But an individual with personal integrity will move both heaven and earth in defense of his (or her) personal reputation.

Which is exacerbated if your fingers are those of someone who as actually done some real work in your life.


Funny thing is Ed, your personal integrity must not be that great if your means of defending it make you look like you have questionable integrity ie insulting people calling them Aholes and the like and generally ranting on about how great you are.

It's also quite presumptuous to assume that because someone doesn't do physical labor and use their hands that they don't do real work. Guess those educators that helped you get that doctorate or the physician that might someday save your life don't do real work huh?

Anonymous said...

Larry, for the record, I have requested you to remove those "plagarized" quotes that *I* never posted.

Ed, you got lucky. I'm on the road, too busy to assemble the dossier of Ed quotes -- in full context -- that highlight your "personal integrity".

I'll give you a little teaser, though: The quote that most enrages you, no doubt because it most clearly exposes you for what you are, is one that you have both furiously denied *and* admitted to writing. No doubt you've completely forgotten that you also admitted to it, but I'll happily post a link to your admission. (That's the problem with lies -- they're so hard to remember. Fortunately the internet has a very long memory.)

If I've piqued your curiosity, all you need to do -- at any time in the future -- is post a single sentence or phrase in which I catch even a whiff of you extolling your own "integrity" or denigrating someone else's. At that point I'll just roll out your quotes. And I'll do it without warning, rather than letting this kind of back and forth push everything off Larry's page. Since you seem to relish having an audience for your words, I'm sure you'll want everyone to have a nice long chance to read and digest every damning thing you've written.

Anonymous said...

If I've piqued your curiosity, all you need to do -- at any time in the future -- is post a single sentence or phrase in which I catch even a whiff of you extolling your own "integrity" or denigrating someone else's. At that point I'll just roll out your quotes. And I'll do it without warning, rather than letting this kind of back and forth push everything off Larry's page. Since you seem to relish having an audience for your words, I'm sure you'll want everyone to have a nice long chance to read and digest every damning thing you've written.


Go for it motherfucker. Just understand that each and every thing that I *didn'tI post is a separate count in a libel suit and YOU have the burden of proving that I did post it.

Furthermore, everything you selectively edit without including the full text is another ocunt.

So go for it motherfucker. I have nothing to fear -- YOU DO.

Anonymous said...

Wow 10:33, you really pissed off Ed this time! Not only is he, gasp, threatening legal action, he slipped out an actual swear instead of his usual "fire truck!"
We are now waiting for your Ed quote recap.

Mainer said...

I am surprised the Dr. had so much trouble with the buttons as he is simply covered with buttons getting pushed constantly.

But, since button technology did not make it to Maine until the early 80's this kinda makes sense. You wait though, once Maine gets the internet, the world will really change, you know, like buttons.

Anonymous said...

There's definitely an issue with the ease of use when using a card with these machines. I've also experienced the lag time in entering the space# issue that another poster reported. I've used these machines in a good few cities and these are without a doubt the least hassle-free.

Dr. Ed said...

We are now waiting for your Ed quote recap.

As am I.

Just remember that I have neither time not interest in continually combing through each and every thread in search of maliciously placed "cut & paste" faux plagiarism. While I ask Larry to remove every one that I find, I make no claim of even trying to find them all -- I do have a life.

Likewise, I have no intention of defending fragments of what I have written -- put the whole thing in or nothing, and don't consider paraphrasing to be quoting.

I think we all agree that the Second Amendment would have a very different meaning if random portions of it were removed.

I don't take kindly to attacks on my ethics and integrity -- and I'll leave it to the reader to conclude about the motives (and integrity) of those who anonymously cut & paste random snips for the sole purpose of defaming me.

So go for it -- just understand one other thing: Google will have your IP address -- forever -- and there are things other than lawsuits to worry about. Anyone remember Anita Hill???

Anonymous said...

Like I said, Ed, I'm on the road... but only until next week. I look forward to hearing your defense -- or your deafening silence -- when faced with your own words, in their complete context.

However, I should note that this post will soon disappear from the front page of the blog. And since Larry sometimes shuts down off-topic threads, I will wait until you give fresh, on-topic cause to highlight your hypocrisy. I trust I will not have to wait long.

P.S. If you didn't actually write the posts signed "Ed" and "Dr. Ed" -- if they're the work of some prankster -- I'm sure you will subpoena Google for the "fake" posts' IP addresses, along with my own, to prove that you have not been defaming yourself.

Anonymous said...

Anyone remember Anita Hill???

Lawsuit, schmawsuit. Who cares.

But when Ed issues a veiled threat to leave a pubic hair on my can of Coke... I must say, that really gives me pause.

Dr. Ed said...

P.S. If you didn't actually write the posts signed "Ed" and "Dr. Ed" -- if they're the work of some prankster -- I'm sure you will subpoena Google for the "fake" posts' IP addresses, along with my own, to prove that you have not been defaming yourself

Who says it will be me with the subpoena? Who says it won't be an investigator verifying that I hadn't posted it? Who says that you won't get dragged in to verify that you weren't a friend of mine who let me use your computer?

Dr. Ed said...

However, I should note that this post will soon disappear from the front page of the blog. And since Larry sometimes shuts down off-topic threads, I will wait until you give fresh, on-topic cause to highlight your hypocrisy. I trust I will not have to wait long

Nor at all. Consider yourself given whatever cause you need to be given, MoFo. I don't like being threat3ened, and I even less like being threatened by some C-Head who never had/has any intention of doing anything.

Your silence is deafening, MoFo - and being "on the road" is irrelevant as you clearly have access to the internet...

Anonymous said...

Your patience shall be rewarded.

Anonymous said...

I think we are dealing with multiple personalities here folks.