Turbo Sucking at the public trough

UPDATE (Wednesday, 2:00 PM) So the Gazette just called as well. Tomorrow morning we will have both Bricks and Mortar articles and some of what you read here will be included. You gotta wonder about these town officials: what the Hell do they think--that the Gazette or Republican would simply run their dumb ass press release without at least making a token effort to check the facts? I just hope the headline editor is paying attention and does not trumpet the "Revenues up 20%!" nonsense.
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Amherst Leisure Services recreation empire once again employs deliberate deception to sell the expensive game of golf .

Well…only expensive for Amherst taxpayers subsidizing the minority who actually play the grandiose game (over half of whom live and pay taxes outside Amherst).

Last year LSSE claimed $7,000 in supposed “net profit “ by ignoring $30,000 in hidden costs (that the Finance Committee covered with an emergency transfer from their Reserve Fund thus leaving no money for pothole repairs); and this year LSSE would have you believe it's $50,000 in "net profit", once again ignoring $30,000 in hidden overhead plus $15,000 in capital items (underground storage tank and security fence) AND the guaranteed $30,000 to simply outsource the ailing business to a private enterprise.

Even our toothless “watchdog” Finance Committee clearly pointed out to a clueless Town Meeting two years ago that when Cherry Hill dissolved as an Enterprise Fund--where the state requires a clear accounting of ALL expenses--$30,000 in routine overhead (employee benefits and clubhouse insurance; but not including Capital) would be dispersed/hidden to other parts of the budget.

And this past year the golf business required an additional $15,000 in Capital items. Not that "Capital" items are a once in a Blue Moon kind of thing, because in the current year (started July 1) they also required $22,000 for a fancy new lawn mower. In fact, a study done at Town Meeting request five years ago discovered two-thirds of their heavy equipment (and golf courses require a lot of heavy equipment) were beyond their rated lifespan.

So capital items will be pretty routine over the foreseeable future.

Two years ago Niblick Management, a private firm, offered Amherst $30,000 free and clear to take over the Black Hole, White Elephant, Money Pit. But Noooooooo, the rookie Town Mangler wanted to prove he had a bigger penis than Barry Del Castilho, the long-time previous Town Manager, who squandered twenty years and $1 million in tax dollars pursuing this Moby Dick.

So here are the actual numbers:
Total revenues $264,00
Total supposed expenditures $207,000

"Expenditures" do not include:
$30,000 employee benefits and Clubhouse insurance
Plus: $15,000 in Capital improvements (Underground gas storage tank and security fence)
Plus: $30,000 in Opportunity Revenue for privatization
Plus: if you did not expend the damn $200,000 on a golf business, and simply left it in Free Cash or Stabilization it would have generated $10,000 in interest revenue.

Actual losses: $28,000 (give or take).

July 4’Th Parade: Fireworks to Fizzle?

So while I was in China (the country) elements of the Amherst 7/4 Parade Committee had lunch at Amherst Chinese (the restaurant) with the Town Manager.

And it was pretty much the same old, same old: “You folks do a great job, I really appreciate all the hard work, BUT...where in the parade can we put those pesky protesters?”

Of course at that point the Committee contemplated a Chinese government response, as in run him over with a tank; but being peace loving folks, simply reminded the Town Manager what the July 4’th Parade is all about: a gala celebration, a party to commemorate all the good things America represents.

About then, the Town Manager made it a tad more interesting, offering to save the Committee money by negating the substantial overhead cost of police security and liability insurance (currently about $1,500). Hmmm….

So on Sunday afternoon at the VFW on Main Street the full committee met among themselves to discus the offer. Responses ranged from “Tell him to go to Hell”, to “Oh, why not, they (the protesters) show up anyway, so we may as well get some reduced overhead by allowing them to march in the back.”

The committee decided more discussion is needed before taking a vote. The Town Manager has agreed to show up this Friday at the VFW to have a beer and continue the negotiation. I’ll drink to that!

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From a series of emails garnered under Public Document Law that resulted in the District Attorney’s office citing the Amherst Select Board for violation of the Open Meeting Law

From: Anne Awad Select Board Chair
Sent: Tuesday, July 12, 2005 2:47 PM
To: Barry Del Castilho, Amherst Town Manager
Subject: RE: 7/4 Parade

Anne Awad: I think a SB fall town meeting article to give $2000 to LSSE to organize
a community parade is in order for next year. {sorry}

Barry L. Del Castilho: Even if that were enough money, the timing couldn't be worse: staff getting ready for pools, summer camps, outdoor sports and what
they already do for the 4th. And their part-time staff has to be cut to
make room for the camp scholarships and special needs funds that were
not funded but not cut from the needs list. Perhaps $2000 for
"co-sponsorship" i.e. the Town provides funds for expenses in return for
a seat at the decision table.

Anne Awad: LSSE IS THE LOGICAL ENTITY TO TAKE IT
ON...IF NOT THEM, SOME OTHER TOWN STAFF.

From: Anne Awad, Select Board Chair
Sent: Wednesday, July 27, 2005 8:56 PM
To: Del Castilho, Barry
Subject: RE: parade issue

Barry,
On reflection, I am going to take a step back on the parade issue. Yes,
there might be something the Select Board could initiate with the goal
of open access for community members who wish to celebrate the 4th in a
parade...but considering the priorities I have set out for this term
(budget process and committee policies), I think I need to focus on
those. The parade committee seems to have enough challenge from
community groups and residents without us jumping into it. I do not
plan to bring this to a Select Board meeting for action.

Anne Awad

There is a season turn, turn, turn

If the crusty Gazette manages to cover this loss for our little town, they will probably lead with something like "President Johnson had just shocked the Democratic party by announcing he would not seek reelection, '60 Minutes' debuted on TV, 'In The Heat Of The Night' won the Academy Award for Best Picture, the average price of a gallon of gas was 34 cents, and Pizza Rama served its first pie (probably to a Umass student)."

But I have better stats: In an average year 2 out of 3 small business startups fail to see their First Anniversary; and 90% have failed by year five.

Read this autobiographical obituary's closing paragraph: it's not too hard to understand how they managed to stay in business for 39 years.

Tear down this barrier

If Governor Duval can visit Amherst, the alien outreach of his Taxachusetts empire, then President Bush can and should visit China for the Olympic opening ceremonies.

Not that he listens to his critics—and no president in US history has had such virulent critics. But some folks are calling on President Bush to pull a Jimmy Carter and boycott the opening ceremonies next month beginning precisely at the lucky moment 8:08:08 pm, August 8, 2008.

The Olympics is all about sport—healthy competition that breeds mutual understanding. When you mix politics with sport you end up with a Munich Massacre. “They’re all gone,” reported Jim McKay to a stunned world over 35 years ago. And the Olympics have never been the same.

The Chinese people are sooooo proud of this upcoming extravaganza. The Olympic mascots seem to emblazon everything.

The debacle of the Olympic torch relay—especially during the Tibet crisis—seems to have passed, negated by world sympathy and the quick response of the communist government to the devastating earthquake. And in China--as in the US--THAT awful day is remembered in shorthand, simply by the numerals: 5/12.

Tibet, unlike the students at Tiananmen Square, received little sympathy in China--perhaps because many Chinese considered it a PR stunt designed to cash in on the Olympics. Or maybe because China’s One-Child policy does not apply to Tibet (only to Han Chinese that comprise about 90% of the population)

Or because China invested so very heavily in an expensive train system to connect Tibet to the homeland.

Everywhere we went the people were as inquisitive as they were courteous. In one hotel room Donna dropped a 100 Yuan note ($15 US dollars) on the floor after we had exchanged some travelers checks. The young man cleaning the room (who probably made less than that per day) left it on my computer under a piece of chocolate.

On an over packed shuttle bus (ubiquitous in China) to our air terminal another young man gets up and sacrifices his seat to my daughter, Kira. And at the airport check in, while I was holding Jada and Donna was fumbling with our passports, an older man behind us in line lifts our heavy bags unto the conveyor.

Yes Mr. President, we need to stay on friendly terms with such an already-emerged Superpower. You’re already halfway there, as The People are as friendly as can be.

(But since you are destined to hang with the power elite, you may want to think about jet black hair polish.)

In the heartland

The Gov came calling

So I checked out the Governor’s public happening in the People’s Republic of Amherst (located west of I-495 otherwise known as “the boonies.”) The affair was scheduled from 2:00 to 3:30 so I arrived with my new young daughter just after 3:00 PM hoping maybe for a Photo Op with the Gov.

A can’t miss combo: Handsome black dude, adorably cute Chinese baby girl--probably the most recent US citizen in the state (almost certainly in the town of Amherst.)

But he was pretty tied up sitting at the head table flanked on both sides by attentive aids otherwise known as his cabinet. And most of the speakers—A Hadley Select Man, a Greenfield Mayor, or a South Hadley Select Woman—spoke at him rather than to him.

And of course, everybody wanted more money.

The room was beyond packed—probably 175 or more (probably a fire code violation) with many standing along the perimeter. A half hour after the scheduled finish they were still going at it.

Jada started to squirm and then whimper, and I knew banshee bellowing was not too far behind, so we left.

But yeah, it was indeed good of the Governor to stop by. Although I have to wonder if maybe he could have learned a lot more with a lot less investment of time and tax money if he simply invited an Amherst DPW worker, firefighter or cop (off duty of course) out for a beer or two.

Yeah, when you Da Man you can park anywhere

And in case you did not know he was Da Man

Battle of the Blogs

Will the Town Manager’s new blog become the ‘Air America’ of the blogosphere?

Yeah, when insiders figured out just how politically powerful conservative talk radio had become, suddenly the Libs thought “I can do that”.

Except they did it very poorly. As in BORING!

And the problem with bureaucrats is they don’t wish to offend ANYBODY, and as a result usually sound like a Daily Hampshire Gazette editorial: “On the one hand; but, on the other hand…”

Still, I can’t wait until the Town Mangler steps up to the plate (where I tend to throw bullet-like fastballs, low and inside)

Bully article