Breaking 'Vagina' News 10:17 am

I'm sitting in a boring Budget Meeting (where town officals are trying to come up with a "bulletproof" sales pitch for a tax Override) so I will upload the new news by noon. God I love this free wireless in town center!

Vagina Monologues: PT Barnum promo

Okay, this is the Internet and we're all adults here, so sure the V- word is fine. The C-word synonym, however, is not.

But I find it weird that even the more benign word "vagina" is repeatedly shouted in a Public School announcement tomorrow at the Amherst Regional High School. Just another 'Only In Amherst' moment. Maybe they should use 'Somewhere, There's a Place For Us' from 'West Side Story' as background music.
As the frustrated parent who just forwarded it to me said in her email: “So much for sensitivity”.

ARHS Morning Announcements
Thursday, January 17th, 2008

* VAGINA! Vagina. Va. Gi. Na. Get used to saying it, because The Vagina Monologues is coming to the high school stage, Friday, February 15th! Mark your calendars, and get ready to become part of the worldwide phenomenon.


UPDATE: 9:00 pm (yeah, past my bedtime)

In a message dated 1/16/08 4:13:57 PM, XXX@hotmail.com writes:
Hi Larry,
I always check the high school daily announcements to be an informed parent. Thought you'd be interested in entry #9 in tomorrows.
http://www.arps.org/hs/News/announcements.html
So much for sensitivity, etc.
Trying to compose my letter to Dr. Hockman now.
Mary


>>2008 4:32 pm >>> 1/16/
Good afternoon Mr. Hochman,
I try to stay informed by reading the HS announcements online a day early.I was taken aback a bit by the ninth entry for tomorrow. While I think you have been sensitive with the whole "V Monologue" situation so far, this seems a bit "in your face" for some kids and quite insensitive. I know you don't write the announcements, or even see them beforehand. It just seemed a bit crude and I wanted you to be aware of it before tomorrow.
Thank you for your time,
Mary XXXX

----- Original Message -----
From: "Jere Hochman"
Sent: Wednesday, January 16, 2008 5:14 PM
Subject: Re: ARHS morning announcements
Dear Ms XXX:

I have not seen the announcements but will review them. We have worked at keeping this topic and performance in perspective and a parameter has been to avoid being in one's face. I am sorry about that. I will review this with Mr. Jackson. Thank you for bringing this to my attention.
Jere Hochman

In a message dated 1/16/08 5:49:09 PM, XXXXXXX@hotmail.com writes to Only In Amherst blogspot:
Well, what do you know!
Mary

From: amherstac@aol.com
To: XXX@hotmail.com
Sent: Wednesday, January 16, 2008 6:18 PM
Hey Mary,
Wow! Mind if I post it on my blog????
Larry

From:
To: amherstac@aol.com
Sent: Wed, 16 Jan 2008 6:41 pm
I'll have to think about it. I had enough heat after the no vote. You should see the reception I get at some school meetings! I know it wouldn't pull much weight if it didn't have a name to it.
Mary

From: amherstac@aol.com
To: XXX@hotmail.com
Sent: Wednesday, January 16, 2008 6:46 PM
Hey Mary,
I would xxx-out your name and email address but leave in your letter and Hochman's response. So obviously he would be the ONLY person to know and if other people found out we would know it HE leaked it (obviously I can keep a secret)
Larry

From:
To: amherstac@aol.com That sounds fine Larry. I am being optimistic that whoever wrote it wasn't thinking and it won't be announced that way tomorrow. Not only thinking about the students but the teachers that may not feel like reading that to a bunch of teens! Ich!
Mary

In a message dated 1/16/08 7:57:42 PM, Amherst AC writes:
Thanks Mary,
They were not thinking when they decided to allow 'VM' in the first place (let alone the second time!)
Larry

FINAL UPDATE: 10:00 pm

Questions to ponder:

Will a bucolic little High School in a state Mitt Romney described as “the most liberal in the nation” really trumpet "VAGINA, vagina, vagina” at tomorrow morning’s announcements?

Will the Crusty Daily Hampshire Gazette have any of this in tomorrow’s edition, since an Editor has been aware of this development since 5:00 pm? Or at the very least their equally crusty "newsroom blog" that's "updated Mon thru Fri".

And will Superintendent Hochman take Amherst Regional High School principal Mark Jackson to the woodshed for a well-deserved spanking?
Another, more sagacious, Jackson:
http://onlyintherepublicofamherst.blogspot.com/2007/06/uncharted-territory-at-that.html

The price of good deeds

Just as she proved with rosy but wrong Cherry Hill revenue figures last year, Selectman Awad still has trouble with numbers. Trying to blunt a firestorm of criticism directed at the Town Manager over his Scrooge tax on the Boy Scout Christmas tree sale, Ms. Awad declared use of the park for “eight weeks” by this local non-profit was different than groups like the Pot Rally who only use town land for a day.

Fortunately Selectman Greeney knows numbers and corrected her by saying the scouts’ use the property for only a month and, furthermore, they clean it up like good scouts do when they are done.

During the discussion Selectman Brewer (herself a Den Mother) asked Shaffer directly if he was going to allow the Boy Scouts to use the property at all, even with the tax, for Christmas sales next year.

Saying he didn’t want the park usage to become “unduly encumbered”, Shaffer suggested the scouts start scouting a new location. All the negative publicity generated by his clueless, un-American decision indicates to his bean-counter mind that the scouts have a “degree of entitlement” to the land.

Let’s see, the Amherst Pelham Boy Scouts have used that location for fifty years with the owners blessing, who set up a trust to purchase the entire property and donate it to Amherst for a “landscaped park”.

The general public--who unfortunately can’t vote him out--took Mr. Shaffer to the woodshed for a well deserved spanking; and rather than learn from his mistake he shifts the blame to the victim.

According to this morning’s crusty Gazette the Town Manager is awaiting his ill-gotten gains, estimated at $700-$800 (or two-months of his auto/cell phone allowance).

I hope the Scouts pay him in pennies!

UPDATE: 9:00 pm. I forget the crusty Gazette actually uploads to the net (many hours after I read hardcopy at 5:30 am.) So I just went to gazettenet and found a couple of cute comments to the cyberstory:

Miss Ellie [ Posted on: Tuesday - January 15, 2008 at 10:09 AM]
I think it would be wonderful if the Senior Center or Leisure Services accepted the so called "donation" and donated it right back to the Boy Scouts.

Julie T [ Posted on: Tuesday - January 15, 2008 at 12:28 PM]
What a crock for Town Manager Larry Shaffer to say , "I appreciate their generosity and kindness," to the Boy Scouts, since he is the one who mandated that they pay to use the land. Perhaps instead, he should say, that he is sorry for being greedy, and that yes, he sees the contribution that the boys make to the town , and that is enough and greatly appreciated; so here is your check back. Instead every year, he will be more greedy and raise the fee to the boy scouts. I real live "scrooge".

Just after the storm, off Bay Road

Nothing like the purity of a new snow.

Crows in a 'V'

Although I’m 100% Irish, I don’t consider myself overly superstitious, but today was a tad weird.

I had decided not to upload until Monday late-morning so my Friday post stayed front-and-center until the Bricks-and-Mortar Media awakens Monday morning around 8:30 am or so…otherwise known as the start of a new news cycle.

So I pull into the Amherst Athletic Club this Sunday morning around 10:45 am (we open at 11) and I’m listening to WDRC the oldies station running a “one hit wonder weekend” and the tune ‘Indiana Wants Me’ is playing.

Including the great line “If a man ever needed dying he did…No one has a right to say what he said about you” And I thought to myself, if we go uptown tonight and some aggressive goof calls my wife or daughter the ‘C-word” how would I react?

And as I exit my car a couple crows sound the alarm from a tree I have probably looked at ten thousand times over the past 25 tears and never noticed the V formation at the top.

The Chinese Kenpo Karate Creed that I have observed for almost 35 years states that “Should I be forced to defend myself, my family or my honor then here are my weapons…. my open hands”

So yeah, branding my wife or daughter the “C-word” definitely trips the “honor” thing, and I would physically engage. And yeah, if he reached into his pocket for what I thought a weapon I would use all-out force…as in lethal.

Better to explain it to a Judge than risk the unthinkable.

No Victory in 'V'

http://www.amherstbulletin.com/story/id/75823/

You can’t tell by the cyber-version, but Mary Carey’s article from last week’s Gazette made today's Amherst Bulletin Front Page, above the fold. And, as they did four years ago, the squeamish Bully headline editor avoids “vagina” in a headline. Talk about underscoring my point.

So it’s okay for young girls to publicly scream the actual C-word, yet the Bulletin hides behind the euphemistic V-word? Yikes! And it’s not like they are know for being a (Christian) conservative publication.

Although not the overall lead story…it’s a good start. Four years ago the first shots fired came from my column 3 or 4 pages inside the late-December issue, when almost nobody was paying attention.

Interestingly the TOP story exposes public officials (lead by School Superintendent Hochman) still smarting from the May 1’st Override failure, eyeing tax money for a professional survey of citizens to discover how best to jam a tax increase down our throats.

According to today’s Gazette the Elementary Schools are $1.4 million and the Regional High School $300,000 in the hole for FY09. So rather than concentrating on filling that budget gap, Hochman and principal Mark Jackson (unless he designates his wife to handle it) will be preoccupied defending this ridiculous ‘Only In Amherst’ decision.

In a message dated 1/8/08 10:28:15 PM, mary.carey@att.net writes:

Hi Larry -- Do you have a comment on the decision to produce the Vagina Monologues that I can use in the Bulletin story. If they decide to cut out the parts you think are most offensive either because of the language or because they seem to condone pedophilia, would you think it is OK to produce a cleaned-up version (if that is allowed)?
Thanks!
--mary

In a message dated 1/9/08 7:58:22 AM, Amherst AC writes:
Hey Mary,
I will be a lot less inclined to unleash the Dogs of War if they do a cleaned up version.
Larry

In a message dated 1/9/08 9:10:25 AM, mary.carey@att.net writes:
What is YOUR ultimate goal, given the current situation, that is that the play will be produced and there may be certain things you can not do with it thanks to the copyright?

In a message dated 1/9/08 9:59:04 AM, Amherst AC writes:
My martial arts philosophy is don't engage in battle unless you are absolutely sure of your position and then if you think for whatever reason you will lose, do SOOOOOO much damage that the opponent will never want to deal with you again. (hand them a Pyrrhic victory)
Larry

In a message dated 1/9/08 12:56:20 PM, mary.carey@att.net writes:
D'oh. I didn't get a chance to include this.


In a message dated 1/9/08 1:17:03 PM, Amherst AC writes:
That's okay: That's why God invented blogging!

And the answer is...

And NO I have not heard back from Amherst School Superintendent Jere Hochman as to whether the Amherst Regional High School performance this year of ‘The Vagina Monologues’ with be an “edited for High School” version or the orgasmic original version (as long as you don’t count the 1996 First Edition) with the monologue that attempts to “reclaim” the C-word where the vile word is often repeated.

Yes, soon after the 2004 performance of ‘The Vagina Monologues', the ONLY high school in America to allow it, ARHS also banned the word “freshman” for incoming 9’th graders. And of course, this is the same school that banned a production of ‘West Side Story’ in 1999.

In his rather long email to me on Saturday Superintendent Hochman explains that High School principal Mark Jackson saw the performance at the Northampton Arts Center last year and was so impressed he decided to damn the torpedoes and go full-speed ahead on this year’s performance on school property.

I don’t know Jackson as he was not here in 2004, but his daughter was in my daughter’s kindergarten class at Crocker Farm Elementary School last year for a few months before he placed her in a private school.

According the Gazette article his wife Lynn Phillips has “written on feminism” but the only thing I could find on a Goggle search was a blurb she wrote for the book ‘Packaging Girlhood’.

Two years ago when the Amherst Regional High School performed ‘Urinetown’ as the official school play, Mr. Hochman emailed me a couple days before the first public announcement just to say it was nothing to get excited about and not to judge a play by its title. After a quick Goggle search I thought it was fine for a high school.

Of course this past week when it was announced that the school would reprise ‘The Vagina Monologues,’ my first notice came by way of the crusty Gazette article. And yes folks I have read the entire book/play, watched Ensler’s DVD and, UGH, attended the 2004 Amherst Regional High School performance (Bill O’Reilly made me do it!).

MYTHS EXPOSED:
http://www.cblpi.org/programs/vday/factsfallacies.cfm

UPDATE: Thursday 3:30 pm I’m waiting for the ultra-crusty Amherst Bulletin to go cyber (got my hardcopy five hours ago) so I can link to their Front Page story. But this was pretty funny. I get an email yesterday from Superintendent Hochman’s office that looks like it went to a bunch of folks:

On Wednesday, January 23, Superintendent Jere Hochman will present an overview of the Amherst-Pelham schools.

This brief presentation will be followed by and important hour of dialogue about our school districts' MISSION and VALUES. What do YOU believe to be the most essential values our schools should characterize? What do YOU believe to be the mission of our public schools?

Gee, off the top of my head, maybe the public schools should try to teach moral values.

UPDATE: Thursday 9:30 pm. So the ultra-crusty Amherst Bulletin finally uploaded but I'm too tired to respond with a new blog upload tonight. But if you go amherstbulletin.com you can read the 'V' story and my instant cyber reaction. More of a prepared response tomorrow.