No longer fearing the 1st

So today marks the very first 1st of the month in 28 years where I did not experience some degree of trepidation brought on by making the rent. Actually my longtime landlord, Dick Johnson, told me early on that payment was due on the 1st but as long as it arrived by the 10th that was considered "on time." Naturally I took to getting it there on the 9th or 10th.

But the 1st of the month always set off that reminder alarm that a sizable chunk of my total monthly overhead was now due, and the clock was ticking.

Yes the Amherst Athletic Club closed June 21 but my new landlords were kind enough to allow me three months at greatly reduced rent--that I pushed to four--so I could try to sell a hundred or so very large, heavy commercial exercise machines one piece at a time; that otherwise would have sold for a song at public auction in the middle of a very hot summer.

Yesterday was the final, final day although I ended up with four pieces remaining--three of which "sold" Sunday morning but the deals never went through.

Although I now have one more week (gratis) to sell them, not having to worry about paying November's rent made the finality hit home this morning--and the weight of treadmill lifted from my tired shoulders.

So again tomorrow I will awaken, minus trepidation, and get through an entire day, without trepidation, and go to bed, minus my old friend, trepidation. Feels weird... Empty.