Say what?

Yeah, Only in Amherst would a town committee waste half the exposure provided by the most premier location in town. Fortunately Amherst needs a Human Rights Commission like Saudi Arabia needs snow plows.

Render unto Caesar…

After 60 years of tariff-free trade on a ritual that marks the transition into the Christmas season for generations of Amherst residents, the Grinch has finally gotten his due: $1 per tree.

Yes, Town Manager Larry Shaffer got mugged by Umass in the ‘Strategic Agreement’ and walked away from $30,000 in annual rent for a municipal golf course that will cost taxpayers that amount this year, but--by God--put him at the table with Boy Scouts of America and he takes no prisoners.

Operated entirely by volunteers, the Amherst Boy Scouts Christmas Tree Sale on Kendrick Park raises money for hometown Troops 500 and 504 to help offset scout related expenses, including scholarships for those who can’t afford the required summer camping.

So it’s not like this is a BIG business generating profits surreptitiously slipped in a back pocket, or applied towards a new Lexus.

The 40-50 Amherst and Pelham Boy Scouts do plenty of volunteer work for their merit badges including food collection for The Survival Center, clearing our extensive Conservation Trails, or helping distribute 3,000 candles on the first anniversary of 9/11.

And while a dollar may sound trivial on trees priced at $35 or $40, last year former Scout Master Bill Hart estimated the entire month-long endeavor generated between $4,000 and $6,000 in net profit. So Amherst’s cut of $775 in rent, amounts to a tax on “profits” of 13%!

Doing ones duty to God and country shouldn’t be so taxing.

Would you like fries with that?

So our illustrious Select board is concerned about charging Umass student promoters of a Pot Festival in Amherst town center for a police detail for, umm, crowd control but think nothing of charging the July 4’th Parade Committee for the same services?

The Parade is a shoestring operation exclusively relying on volunteers, so last years $1,100 tab for a police detail is significant chunk of our budget (as is insurance). But as a Parade organizer let me be quick to say I’m not complaining.

We actually get double bang for our thousand bucks as the detail we hire stand in busy intersections blocking off pre-parade traffic and then stay for the parade to do security (Only in Amherst do you worry about parade crashers at a July 4’th event) where they blend in well with the many police, fire and—God forbid—military units.

Of course, the only way police blend in at a pot rally is if they are under cover, dressed in grunge.

Last month during the World Series Amherst PD consumed $15,000 in overtime standing by in riot gear to assist Umass PD. And ever since his Lordship Gerry Weiss took a bow for orchestrating the Mutual Aid Pact, Amherst PD has provided all the aid.

Just because a “political” event is limited to the town common doesn’t mean hard pressed taxpayers should cover the tab. What if NAMBLA wanted to organize a pedophilia rally?

Mission Accomplished

Since the bricks and mortar media has a brief attention span and their one day romance with the BIG house move in Amherst is over, I thought you might like an update.

Day One: The garage made it half way up the hill and the house was resting comfortably at the bottom of the hill barely off the Main Street after crawling .75 miles from Kendrick Park.

Day Two: The garage makes it to the top of the hill but no foundation has been prepared so it sits there slightly off kilter. The house only slogs about 50 yards, making it halfway up hill (or halfway down if you’re a pessimist).

Day Three: The house has landed on its new foundation facing Gray Street. Welcome to the neighborhood! (Spoken like a true non-NIMBY)

Oh come all ye faithless

Okay, can we recall the house movers and have them drag the Pastorello’s house (photo below) in South Amherst up to town center to better represent Amherst this holiday season?

I’m embarrassed, ashamed, and yeah, pissed off! The Merry Maple (not to be confused with a Christmas Tree) is hardly Merry. The Umass Marching Band was awesome as usual (and MY GOD they even played Christian yuletide standards) . Santa arrived on the Fire Department’s GIGANTIC Ladder Truck, and that too was pretty awesome. But let’s face it, the lighting display in Amherst town center rivals that of North Korea.

Shame on the cheapskate Chamber of Commerce; and the People's Republic of Amherst. Whippletree Lane is the place to be:

From the Crusty Gazette 11/30/07 (Duh!):
Richard Pastorello said in some ways the large amount of lighting at their home makes up for the rest of Amherst, which tends to have fewer displays than other towns in which he has lived. But they will be paying for it, with the average electric bill rising from about $150 to $900 last December, and likely a bigger jump this year.

Richard Pastorello said the most money ever collected (for charity) was in 2001, when the display brought in $2,500. "Because this is the last time, our goal is to break that record," he said.

Come on folks, let's boycott town center until they come into the real (American) world, patronize Mr. Pastorello and break the record (set just after 9/11) for donations to a good cause.


Last Year's Merry Maple (the Grinch must stolen the colored lights this year) Photo borrowed from Inamherst.com

UPDATE (late Monday afternoon):So I went to the Jones Library in town center to give my daughter something to do and bumped into someone in the know. He said last year Banknorth (also located in town center) donated just over $3,000 for the light display--as apparently they had done for a number of years. This year they gave ZIP. Ouch! Pretty big hit to absorb all at once (the least they could have done was phased out the donation over a couple years). So there's another Grinch.

Buddy can you spare a dime (or 500-K)?

After years of debate at committee meetings and multiple Town Meeting approvals and a Referendum vote at the ballot box upholding Town Meeting's approval, construction snafus, and even a Department of Environmental Protection citation, the Plum Brook soccer fields may not be out of the woods yet.

According to a November 15 memorandum to municipal clients from our new town law firm Kopelman and Paige, “…one trial court judge has found that the language of the CPA intentionally prohibits municipalities from using CPA funds to rehabilitate or restore land for recreational use that was not acquired or created with CPA funds.”

Amherst acquired Plum Brook back in 1974, twenty-five years before creation of the Community Preservation Act. Town officials decided to use CPA money for soccer field construction, borrowing $500,000 and paying it off on the installment plan using CPA funds with the first $40,000 payment commencing in FY04.

It’s not an ‘Only In Amherst’ thing, town officials everywhere spend CPA money as though it were a gift from God. Jealously guard your General Fund dollars but treat water/sewer fund money, Chapter 90 (state road money) or CPA funds as somehow less valuable and therefore subject to less scrutiny.

Exactly why the Town Manager gave away over $200,000 in effluent to Umass over the next five years. He figured the “Strategic Agreement” would bring in a few more dollars to the General Fund and who cares about the Sewer Fund, except of course for the thousands of taxpayers in town who also pay sewer fees.

Wednesday night Town Meeting overwhelmingly voted not to ask the Select board to rethink their Umass water giveaway; now after this recent court decision, Town Meeting may have to rethink the financing of the Plum Brook Soccer fields.

And no, we can’t use Sewer funds.

UPDATE (early afternoon Saturday):
In a message dated 12/1/07 10:01:36 AM, krystyobolyte writes (and attached the court case PDF):

This is the trial court level case. Caution - this is not binding precedent; only cases from the Appeals Court or SJC are binding on the trial courts. So, this is not yet established as the "law of the land." It does indicate that there is at least one judge out there who holds this opinion, and it wasn't appealed.


In a message dated 12/1/07 10:15:05 AM, Amherst AC writes:

Yeah, I read it prior to posting yesterday; as well as Kopelman and Paige's take on it. And I believe it is under Appeal, so when the esteemed Appeals Court gets around to it then, I believe, it will become the law of the land.

And even if it were not under appeal, Kopelman and Paige state: "While the Seideman case, which is now under appeal, is a Superior Court case and creates no precedent for other courts considering similar facts, it may be persuasive to other trial court judges." Seemed pretty persuasive to me.

Whenever I push the envelope, I always ask myself what would a jury think? And after reading the CPA regulations it is quite clear both Newton and Amherst (and God knows how many other communities over the past few years) screwed up.
LK

I owe my soul to...

So late last night Town Meeting, with almost no discussion, reaffirmed that Amherst is indeed a Company Town…with Umass minding the store.

Article #20, advising the Select board to reconsider its 3-2 vote gifting Umass $200,000 in water, was so overwhelming shouted down it would have been useless (although interesting) to call for a recorded Tally Vote.

Why am I surprised? As Finance Committee member Kay Moran observed when they--our supposed watchdogs--voted unanimously to oppose the article “Almost everybody in Town Meeting is connected to Umass” And unfortunately, Town Meeting members are exempt from 'Conflict of Interest' Law.

Mt. Holyoke College (and what have they contributed to South Hadley lately?) professor emeritus Diana Stein, corrected me on the figure I obtained from Answers.com for Umass’s current Endowment: $348,100,000. She told Town Meeting the Amherst flagship was only in the hundred thousand range; I think she meant to say million, but on the floor of town meeting almost nothing ever gets corrected.

Ms. Stein, who claims to be running for Select board but will not announce till January, also pointed out on the Town Meeting listserve earlier in the day that almost all the esteemed institutes of higher education that pay impact fees to their home community are private schools.

So what! Fire protection costs the same for rich or poor, private or public, Republican or Democrat. What matters is call volume--and that is dependent on overall size.

That is why the comparison (and even Ms. Stein deemed it “surprising” that UVM is state funded) with the University of Vermont is so stunning. They are 2.5 times smaller in both land area and student population, but will pay Burlington twice as much as Umass pays Amherst in 2010. For fire protection only, as UVM has it’s own ambulance service that covers the campus and actually provides service to the city.

Since I believe UVM is not overpaying for fire protection, could Larry Shaffer and Umass have underestimated the cost of fire/ambulance service to the campus? Considering the Town Manager is math challenged over the ailing golf course, I’m not surprised.

This year’s Fire/EMS budget is $3.5 million and the emergency dispatch center is another $500,000. I always hear Chief Hoyle use 25% for Umass’s drain on the department, thus making their fair share $1 million--a tad over the $425,000 claimed in the ‘Strategic Agreement’.

His Lordship Select man Weiss told Town Meeting Umass would jettison the overall agreement if they nixed the $38,000 effluent waiver. Wouldn’t you love to play poker with this naive ninny? I pointed out that this represents only 10% of this overly one-sided deal, so Umass would never walk away from it.

And if they did, good riddance. Next time they call 911 tell them the number has been disconnected for non-payment.
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In a message dated 11/28/07 6:55:34 AM, amherstac@yahoo.com writes to Town Meeting Yahoo listserve (110 members):

BOSTON is the KING of PILOT’S (Cambridge the Queen):
Berklee Colllege of Music: $191,304

Boston College: $261,397

Boston University: $4,406,158

Emmerson College: $27,029

New England School of Law: $13,125

Harvard: $1,810,639

Northeastern University: $141,132

Suffolk University: $141,132

Tufts University: $135,582

Wentworth Institute: $35,867

Cambridge:
Harvard: $2.4 million

MIT: $1.5 million

Watertown:
Harvard: $3.8 million

Providence, RI:
Brown University: $2 million

RI School of Design: $792,000

New Haven, Ct.
Yale: $2 million

Ithica, NY
Cornell: $1.1 million