Sunday, March 13, 2016

No Balcony For You!

Orchard Hill balconies are now off limits

Because they could be misused by misguided college aged youth, UMass has decided to seal off access to 43 (of 44) balconies in the Orchard Hill residential complex.

Quoted in the Massachusetts Daily (except Friday) Collegian, PR spinmeister Ed Blaguszewski confirms the Nanny move was related to the recent tragic deaths of two students from falls, even though one of those occurred in New York City.

"Given  the significant public attention and media coverage that followed, Enku Gelaye  and the student affairs staff became concerned about vulnerable students who might be affected."

So if the darn media did not put a spotlight on those tragic events and whip up public concern, UMass would have not have thought about locking the balconies?

Kind of like nothing was done about the Blarney Blowout until the national media covered the chaos unleashed in 2014, even though it was steadily escalating in 2012 and 2013.

Maybe UMass should also ban cars on campus as they cause far more damage than the stationary balconies that have been there forever without much of a body count to their credit.

15 comments:

Anonymous said...

When balconies are outlawed, only outlaws will have balconies.

Dr. Ed said...

Maybe they should ban Enku Gelaye and the Student Affairs staff....

This is bullshite -- it isn't like they can't jump out a window....

Anonymous said...

When the campus bans all cars,
And Jupiter aligns with Mars,
It will be the dawning of
… The Age of…!

Anonymous said...

Why do they need to use balconies? During the Blarney Blowout they were part of the problem with flying projectiles and mob behaviour.

Larry Kelley said...

There was no Blarney Blowout the past two years, so why now?

Anonymous said...

You go to UMass? Then why do you care.

Larry Kelley said...

Well I did graduate from UMass, and now my taxes go towards the operation budget.

Anonymous said...

More of your taxes should be going to UMass. The state contribution to UMass is pathetic compared to other state Universities...

Dr. Ed said...

The state contribution isn't as pathetic as you might think when you include the pension (and retiree health benefits) liability.

As to balconies, you can go out there for a few minutes rather than punch someone -- I call that a good thing...

Anonymous said...

Campus Center balconies have been locked for decades.

Zac Bears said...

"More of your taxes should be going to UMass. The state contribution to UMass is pathetic compared to other state Universities..." Perhaps the most truthful comment I've ever seen on Only In The Amherst (of Larry Kelley's Mind).

;)

Anonymous said...

Drip, drip, drip -- student life goes down the drain.

Dr. Ed said...

Zac, has it occurred to you that the reasons why the Commonwealth doesn't contribute as much as you wish is because the rest of the Commonwealth realizes that Planet UMess is a fascist leftwing gulag?

Anonymous said...

This is one of the dumbest things I've ever heard... or is it? By this logic, all windows in southwest should be welded shut, bars should be put on all windows at web dubois, roof access of the campus center garage should be walled off and every tree and telephone pole on campus should be guarded with razor wire.

Might as well drain the pond too.

When students illustrate how fragile they are by demanding "safe spaces" being alerted by "trigger warnings" and their hyper sensitivity to "microaggressions," the administrations has little choice but to child-proof an entire campus.

You students wanted a safe zone, YOU GOT IT!!!!

Anonymous said...

Such as it is...