Define "harassed"
So maybe school officials should go on a witch hunt to ferret out the other 20% who would not drop a dime on a harassment scenario and harass them into compliance.
Do public officials really think these “social norms messages” suddenly turns outliers into conformists? Or is it just something to do to make it appear they are doing something?
And 28% of 27, 269 do not
Yes, I suppose they would argue it's not a sudden thing but a long term indoctrination starting as early in life as possible that makes the difference.
Kind of like the liberal mindset PC attitude that's so prevalent in the town of Amherst.
Government sponsored at every turn.
59 comments:
So 80% think you should tell an adult. What percentage actually tell an adult? Thinking something and taking action are very different things. Action in the face of possible adversity is a difficult thing at any age.
As for U-mass, when 28% don't support the policies that is a pretty telling statistic to explain our student drinking and disorderly problem. 28% percent based on the undergrad numbers is over 6000 students. Hardly a fair match to the number of police in Amherst or Umass. Those police officers really are doing a great job with limited resources.
The target of these messages is not the 20% or the 28%, it is a much smaller number who are in the process of solidifying their core set of values, a small percentage who maybe have different sets of friends with different social attitudes. They do not target the outliers at all, whom advertisers consider a lost cause.
Like how Romney correctly stated that 47% of the electorate would never vote for him and so he wouldn't even try to get their attention...the battle is for a small percentage increase from the "undecided".
The enormous billboards advertising BEER on the way into UMass territory work on the same principle.
Too much emphasis has been placed on bullying in recent years including laws. Is bullying today any different than bullying in the past? Is the real problem bullying at all? Could the real problem be that children are not taught to handle situations or even criticism when they are young and do not know how to handle it when they have to face it?
Our kids are now coddled beyond belief. Helicopter parenting is clogging the skies. How will children who have difficulty dealing with a bully as be able to handle a difficult boss as an adult? I wonder if this generation will ever know a drivers test as it will be eliminated because not everyone can pass it.
We've become a culture where bully-spotting has become a sport; bullying itself a ubiquitous label and damning accusation fueled by a breed of these helicopter parents who want to protect their kids from every stick and stone and shade of color all disguised under the umbrella of political correctness.
To add injury is a newly formed industry that use federal funding to whip parents further into a frenzy by making bullying bigger than it is. The anti-bully crusading has become evangelical especially in liberal minded towns like Amherst.
And like the myth of greater violence against women than women against men by the feminist, the anti-bully crusade has a become a cottage industry complete with commentators and prevention experts and a new breed of legal scholars, all preparing to take on an 'enemy' that's always been there and isn't going to go away regardless of how many posters you put up or school assemblies you have.
I watch normal interactions between 2nd graders each week where taunting and teasing goes on. And I see it in kindergarten kids too come to think of it. Some would scream "bullying" and lock down the school. And yes this being done by the kids of the folks who are on the bullying crusade. I look at it as a normal part of becoming a fully functioning human being. I'm not alone it seems.
Everyone who can remember sure can appreciates this video:
http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=c12_1370729168
Wally,
Just when I think nothing you say can surprise me, you prove me wrong. So, your message is, if you are being bullied, suck it up?
To bad Phoebe Prince didn't know that was what she was supposed to do. You ought to have a conversation with some parents of bullied kids and see what it's like from their point of view.
People should not be bullies, whether they are 5 years old or 55 years old. And no one should have to be subjected to bullying, either at 5 or 55.
In the schools it is important to identify and eradicate harassment and bullying. (It could take on a lot of forms, eg., a large group of girls labeling one a "slut". I'm not going to try to define "harassment".) The reason is that every kid has the right to an equal and unencumbered education, in an environment free from, as much as is possible, distractions from the reasons for being there. (Being a 15 y.o. girl and hearing the "slut" chant everyday is enough to take a kid right out of her ability to focus on the subjects she needs to in order to have all the opportunities she has a right to.)
I guess some others would be use of racial and ethnic slurs and overt sexual harassment, as a weapon against another's self-esteem or their feeling (yes, i said "feeling") of safety and security (whether they be lobbed by other kids, or adults who are supposed to be in charge.)
If you can't define "harassment and bullying" then how the Hell are you going to "eradicate" it?
And No, the good old "I know it when I see it" does not count.
Larry, is it your position that if you can't "define" bullying or harrasement the schools should do norhing to address bullying? Surely a person knows when they are being bullied. Surely a teacher recognizes bullying when they see it.
I can't figure out what your pisition is. In the past you seemed to be sympathetic to Phoebe Prince.
Yes and after 9/11 I was sympathetic to "national security".
But I still think the current NSA scandal, and recent IRS auditing conservative groups scandal, and wire tapping reporters phone lines scandal goes a tad too far.
If you can't define "harassment and bullying" then how the Hell are you going to "eradicate" it?
Do my words represent some kind of an official statement from the public schools to you or something? So here we go again: one anonymous commenter says "I'm not gonna answer your question" and that instantly becomes "No one can answer the question". I promise you my words are my opinions and mine alone.
Larry, can you define "suspicious activity"?
Why don't you ask a cop what harassment is?
Here's a good place to start if you are truly seeking the answers:
harassment (either harris-meant or huh-rass-meant) n. the act of systematic and/or continued unwanted and annoying actions of one party or a group, including threats and demands. The purposes may vary, including racial prejudice, personal malice, an attempt to force someone to quit a job or grant sexual favors, apply illegal pressure to collect a bill, or merely gain sadistic pleasure from making someone fearful or anxious. Such activities may be the basis for a lawsuit if due to discrimination based on race or sex, a violation on the statutory limitations on collection agencies, involve revenge by an ex-spouse, or be shown to be a form of blackmail ("I'll stop bothering you, if you'll go to bed with me"). The victim may file a petition for a "stay away" (restraining) order, intended to prevent contact by the offensive party. A systematic pattern of harassment by an employee against another worker may subject the employer to a lawsuit for failure to protect the worker. (See: harass, sexual harassment)
I know that some of the things A-Rod said and did constituted harassment...
It is a legal term, you know.
So is "stalking," and now about every other week some Nitwit threatens to have me arrested for it.
Well, that would not be me, and, how is that an answer to any of the questions raised here, and how did this become about you again.
Because it IS my Blog; and there ARE people how would like to shut it down.
Maybe the school should just put up signs saying "CONFORM!"
"Resistance is futile; you will be assimilated."
Well I'm not one of them, for the record. I hope you have reported any harassment you have been the recipient of, and filed a restraining order with the police if necessary (they will certainly know everything there is to know about them, they deal with harassment, stalking, and abuse all the time.)
But this sounds like a conversation for another story. Let's get back to the subject you posted about, no?
advertisements, percentages, strategies for winning over undecided's sentiments into the majority...
bul·ly 1 (bl)
n. pl. bul·lies
1. A person who is habitually cruel or overbearing, especially to smaller or weaker people.
2. A hired ruffian; a thug.
3. A pimp.
4. Archaic A fine person.
5. Archaic A sweetheart.
v. bul·lied, bul·ly·ing, bul·lies
v.tr.
1. To treat in an overbearing or intimidating manner. See Synonyms at intimidate.
2. To make (one's way) aggressively.
v.intr.
1. To behave like a bully.
2. To force one's way aggressively or by intimidation: "They bully into line at the gas pump" (Martin Gottfried).
adj.
Excellent; splendid: did a bully job of persuading the members.
interj.
Used to express approval: Bully for you!
besides... the posters don't suggest a way to behave or think any more than a beer billboard does. They simply say "here is a fact", or "here's what our beer looks like. now, you decide what you want to do or believe or consume"
an example of "A person who is habitually cruel or overbearing, especially to smaller or weaker people" might be if an overweight mother decides to hold a sign stating her political views, in accordance with her rights as an American citizen, in town center, and then someone with the ability to use media to reach hundreds of thousands of viewers, makes fun of her and allows others to use his forum to call her "fat".
It is what it is.
Walter, "teasing" and "bullying" are two very different things. Which do you witness among the second graders you observe every day?
teasing present participle of tease (Verb)
Make fun of or attempt to provoke (a person or animal) in a playful way: "he teased Jill about her dress"; "she was just teasing".
Examples of TEASE
He and his wife enjoy teasing each other about their different tastes in music.
He was always teased by his brother about being short.
Covert bullying is often harder to recognize and can be carried out behind the bullied person's back. It is designed to harm someone's social reputation and/or cause humiliation.
walter, re the video you posted:
ah, yes, the fifties. that time when you weren't allowed to vote if your skin was black; "mentally retarded" and physically handicapped kids were segregated far, far away in institutions of "learning"; and young female secretaries had to choose between having sex with their boss or losing their job.
the "good old days". (big time sarcasm font.)
It was what it was.
Hmm, since some of your behaviour over the years has included bullying and harrassment, no wonder you can't identify it.
Anne Awad misused the word "stalking" and tried to tag you with it.
We saw that for what it was.
Okay, wow, that got a lot of hits. But I've got an opinion also. ADULTS (and young people) don't get involved often enough. Whether it be Phoebe Prince or whoever, adults frequently have a lot of knowledge of the abuse taking place and don't do anything about it. A complicated problem?, yes!, but you can't ignore bullying. Adolescents go through a lot, and they need our support!
I can draw the same analogy to the military, sexual abuse takes place all the time, and people don't report it, with reason, because they're afraid they'll be ostracized, and two, because they're afraid their superiors don't care. And that's a valid concern, many superiors in the military couldn't give a darn about sexual abuse and rape, and will put the victim through endless dead end solutions, often with disastrous results. One way to make a problem GO AWAY is to slow the legal process to a CRAWL. That's common knowledge. The victim will eventually give up.
The school administration should also conform to the idea of no bullying...having worked in the schools, and having been bullied by people at the top echelon of the schools, who have little to no respect for the ideas of others,
they really need to take a look at themselves as well as the children they are educating. As a friend says, "The fish, it stinks from the head."
Oh, and there's this, from the ARHS Student and Family Handbook, which is a public document which I found online in about 60 seconds. Every student and family is expected to read and understand what is in the handbook, including this most recent definition of harassment
Harassment means verbal or physical conduct based on a student's actual or perceived race,
color, religion, national origin, sex, age, sexual orientation or disability, and which has the purpose or effect of substantially interfering with a student's educational performance or creating
an intimidating, hostile, or offensive environment.
The following is not intended as an inclusive list of conduct that may violate this policy.
Disability Harassment:
Unwelcome verbal, written or physical conduct directed at a person based on his/her
disability or perceived disability, including damaging or interfering with use of necessary
equipment, imitating manner of movement, using disability-related slurs, or invading
personal space to intimidate.
National Origin Harassment:
Unwelcome verbal, written or physical conduct directed at a person based on his/her
national origin, ancestry, or ethnic background such as negative comments about
surnames, customs, language, accents, immigration status or manner of speaking.
Racial Harassment:
Unwelcome verbal, written or physical conduct directed at a person based on his/her race
or color, including racial slurs or insults based on characteristics of a person's race or
color, racial graffiti or symbols, hostile acts based on race, nicknames based on racial
stereotypes, negative comments about appearance, imitating mannerisms, taunting, or
invading personal space to intimidate.
Religious Harassment:
Unwelcome verbal, written or physical conduct directed at a person based on his/her
religion, including derogatory comments about religious beliefs, traditions, practices
(includes non-belief), or religious clothing.
Sexual Orientation Harassment:
Unwelcome verbal, written or physical conduct, directed at a person based on his/her actual or
perceived sexual orientation, such as anti-gay slurs or insults, imitating mannerisms, taunting, or
invading personal space to intimidate.
Hate Crime: A crime motivated by hatred or bias or where the victim is targeted or selected for
the crime at least in part be because the person is a different race, color, national origin,
ethnicity, religion, gender, or sexual orientation from the perpetrator or because the targeted person has a disability. A hate crime may involve a physical attack, threat or bodi1y harm, physical intimidation, or damage to another’s property.
Indicators that a crime may constitute a hate crime include:
Use of racial, ethnic, religious or anti-gay slurs;
Use of symbols of hate, such as a swastika or burning cross
So, I guess you can say no one who attends ARHS doesn't know what the administration considers "harassment", as ignorance is not innocence.
Notice, Walter, that teasing does not enter into the definition.
It's the law, fellas, it's the law.
Isn't the word "freshman" banned at ARHS?
But underage girls could scream the C-word in a public forum. Hmm ...
You're losing me here Larry. I think you'd recognize it in short order if one of your kids were being bullied. And, you'd expect something to be done about it. No?
I would handle it.
But how would you know it was bullying? And don't say "I'll know it when I see it."
There are also strict rules against retaliation. yYou should teach your kids to follow proper protocol, as outlined in the Student and Family Handbook.
And the thing about the c-word? That was more than ten years ago under a different administration.
...having worked in the schools, and having been bullied by people at the top echelon of the schools...
Waaaaaah! We're talking about the kids, we're not talking about the poor grown-ups. And it's pretty easy for anyone at all to say they worked for the schools and anonymously accuse "the upper echelon" of "bullying"...in other words your accusation lacks any credibility. Unless you'd care to give some specifics.
You should have ratted out the "people" to your union rep, the police, your lawyer, etc. Adults have all those means at their disposal. Kids do not, they need the adults and the very specific guidelines they are provided, as required by LAW.
The word freshman is not "banned" at ARHS.
"Banned" means to legally prohibit...
We'd get a lot more conversing done around the issue you posted about if you would stop changing the subject every time someone makes a point you differ with, and if we didn't have to provide you with so many readily available definitions.
no one's screaming the c-word at arhs these days, that was a long time ago, and my understanding is that many who were within the admin then and still are were not necessarily on board with it. The guy who was in charge then left for another job where they were willing to pay him double what we were. go figure.
What percentage of the student body actually takes the survey?
Well we know at least ten students took the survey.
So Walter (2 12:16 PM), I'd like to see some statistics or other proof from reputable sources of your assertion that "And like the myth of greater violence against women than women against men by the feminist, the anti-bully crusade."
For example, According to the Bureau of Justice Statistics Crime Data Brief, which measured only physical assaults, "there were 691,710 nonfatal violent victimizations committed by current or former spouses, boyfriends, or girlfriends of the victims during 2001(Rennison, 2003). Of these, 85% were against women(Rennison, 2003). The NVAWS also found that 22.1 percent of women surveyed, compared to 7.4 percent of men, reported being physically assaulted by a current or former partner in their lifetime(Rennison, 2003 ).
this should be a forum, not a blog.
careful, anon 9:35, walter has some "facts" from some "studies" that "prove" that children need fathers much more than they need mothers...
At least those posters are a start. Peer pressure is a key factor.
I consider bullying the biggest issue of our era and I'd help develop a solution if leaders in this community can help develop a replicate-able plan that could change the status quo.
I wish I could go back to ARJHS and give some hugs and encouragement to people who I now know had really rough years there.
And it's worse today in 2013 with the internet. Kids aren't free of harassment after school - he "mean girls" haunt them all the time.
And all I can think of is how sad and angry these kids will be as adults, and how their anger and pain should manifest as violence. It's preventable.
I wish I had a mentor or a guide book when I was 13. That explained what I was (and everyone else was!) going through and how to navigate best. How everyone at age 13 is evolving and questioning and scrambling. How the wrong way to be is to put others down to get higher up. How the right way to be 13 is to make friends and support other people and build others up. How a smile or a compliment to a quiet or discouraged person you see during a day in middle school can change a life. That the power of your positivity can change the world.
Maybe an elementary school class outlining such concepts would help.
Well said Cinda, the only part I differ with is the idea that the kids who are getting bullied and harassed the worst will be angry as adults and that their anger will manifest itself as violence. I'm not sure that that's the case, and saying so may place another burden on the victim, now and later. Certainly many have learned forgiveness, or at least have worked through it and have let it go.
I guess also I would say that the posters aren't just a start, they are part of a process that has been happening. In my perception there has been much greater intervention going on recently--for the bullied and the bullier--compared to when we went to school, as well as many more classes and events that are truly inclusive. And a greater awareness on the part of the adults of the social world of the kids. Furthermore the state has, since our days, helped to define in detail what constitutes bullying and harassment, provides examples, and provides suggestions for intervention and proper protocol, which all schools are required by law to adopt. The old "let them punch it out" adage is not acceptable any longer.
Small but significant percentage increases...
Thank you for sharing your comments with us and I think everyone would be happy to see you contribute.
and there is a program in the elementary schools which teaches and outlines the concepts we are talking about here to every student, i think it's been in place for a couple of years now. i forget what it's called, maybe Larry knows, his kids have taken part in it.
Just don't suggest we cut anything out of the schedule to accommodate such a program further!
But I would cut out... Hmmmmm...
Science and PE.
Yeah, cut science. We don't want anyone to be able to compete for high paying jobs.
Ok, fine. Let's see... hmmmm...
Art.
The programs/classes that have been in place for a couple years now in the elementary schools and middle school are "Second Step" and "Steps To Success", taught to each kid in their classroom. Also Crocker CARE is what Larry's kids also get at their elementary school (Cooperation Accountability Respect Empathy). The CARE program is used in elementary schools across the nation.
Scholarly articles (Princeton, Harvard, et al) on CARE:
http://scholar.google.com/scholar?q=CARE+cooperation+accountability+respect+empathy+&btnG=&hl=en&as_sdt=0%2C22&as_vis=1
One way to make a problem GO AWAY is to slow the legal process to a CRAWL. That's common knowledge. The victim will eventually give up.
Tom, you have described UMass' approach to (legally mandated) ADA accommodations in a nutshell. On one occasion, after six months had passed since I had filed something, my attorney candidly asked me "exactly what part of "within 10 days" do these people not understand?
The part about where they only follow their own rules if it is to their benefit to do so. The truly bullying at UMass is in the provision of ADA accommodations -- I don't call that office Disability Disservices without a reason.
You (collectively, not "you,Tom") claim that there is more inclusion of the disabled and less bullying now -- but that is bullshite. The "inclusion" is of those disabled students whose disabilities are so severe, and whose abilities are so limited, that they aren't a threat to the students' themselves.
When we can provide inclusion and accommodations for the disabled student whose abilities enable him/her/it to instantly rise to the top of the class and then outpace everyone else -- when we accept helping a student like this as much as helping the borderline retarded one -- then we will be inclusive.
Bollocks. You have no real world experience regarding what is happening in the ARPS's. You simply don't know what the hell you're talking about. You should have told UMass to bite it and gone to work. How old were you when you finished school, anyway?
Speaking of bullying.....
Nope. You haven't read the definition. Perhaps because when I posted the long and detailed version of the definition of BULLYING from the ARHS Student and Family Handbook Larry did not publish it.
I am "just teasing". And besides, Ed's a big boy, he can certainly take what he dishes out on the internet.
Again... we were trying to talk about impressionable young kids who need adult guidance and clear parameters, not post-middle aged blowhards who nobody would let near a public shool, and who spend their days attacking Amherst and UMass employees online.
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